Ceramah Ustaz

So,  recently lots of women posted the above on their FB status.  With a firm nod of approval, they seemed like folding their hands and look at their husband with the look that says, "Eat that, bitch!!".  Then come the look that said, "I didn't say that, the Ustaz said it!"  If the religion says so, that means women are not sinned if they don't do any of the chores.

Frankly, I do agree that women are not suppose to do all the chores on their own.  It's something that is shared in the household.  The moment these responsibilities are turned to unspoken contracts, thats when expectations become intolerable.

Coming back to the quote above, as posted by many women, wives and wives-to-be, is this a statement to remind their partners that they the wives have been wrongly treated, a warning or ....... did they just shot themselves in the foot again??  OK, OK......... can see many blurr face now.  How the hell did they shot themselves in the foot by posting a quote from my beloved 'bapak-angkat'.  (Ok, I confess, I don't attend much of his classes nowadays........ ).  Let's look closely at the quote and read with our mind, not with your heart ;-)

1.  As we all know, this is not even 5% of the full session.  But, only this part was taken and repeatedly posted to affirm the message.

2.  The 'real' wives who has been doing these, and doesn't complain are not stupid nor afraid of their husband.  They are the ones who do it for the family coz they love their husband and family.  They did it out of love  in order to make the family an environment a better place to live.  And, the husbands did not set upon them that it is their responsibility to do it.

3.  Could it be that the women who posted this and repeatedly trying to send the message over are those that think that their living-status are greater than the husbands?  Could it be that they think they are exempt from all the chores because, just like the husbands, they also bring back the moolah?  Could it be that they are having lazy-ass husbands that earn less and treated them badly, or not as how their colleagues at work treat them?  Could it be that the women who posted this, has, a point in their life cheated on the husband, the family or themselves and that by posting this, it could divert some attention to the husbands?  It could be anything........

Next, lets take it sentence by sentence and look at what it meant.  The first sentence says that a wife should be treated like a queen, not a slave that has to do all the work.  I totally agree!!  Why would you want someone that you love dearly be a slave??  Its just simple common sense.  Hopefully, you're not one of those that got an inconsiderate wife who doesn't appreciate a husband that treats a wife like a queen, hence becoming demanding and everything is accountable by the actions.

2nd sentence - "Household chores are the responsibilities of the men." - True, however in the current concept of living, husbands go to work while housewives stays home and caretake the house.  For working couples, they get their maid to do that.  This agreement is called, "I-pay-you-clean".  Usually, in this situation, the wives will not do anything as it deemed that they have done their part by bringing in some of the family's income.

3rd sentence - "The Quran didn't say that these duties should be done by the wives." - The Quran also didn't say that working wives should put their bosses a priority than their husbands.  The Quran also didn't say that it is OK to show parts of their body to other men.

4th sentence - "The duties of a wive is to take care of the children and treat the husband with tender loving care." - Most wives would rather have the maid do it as it is already in the contract. "I-pay-you-serve".  In this context, 'treating' the husband means serving him his meals, talking to him in a manner that a wife should  and anticipate his likes or dislikes, and tolerate and accept his shortcomings.  Complaining about it now doesn't gonna improve anything.

5th sentence - "Because of the wive's tolerance and obedience, she willingly does the house chores with love and sincerity." - Does this mean that wives nowadays lack tolerance because of their civic-minded status and social paradigm?

6th sentence - "Heaven is for the wives who serve their husbands who are loyal to Allah and abide by the ways of Quran." - There's a difference between treating the husband sincerely with love and passion, against doing it for the 'social pressure'.

7th sentence - "It is not compulsory to be faithful to husbands that commit vices and doesn't worship Allah." - Does this give the right for the wives to starting fucking around??


So, there you go.  What is actually the reason of these women posting this part of the talk by the Ustaz and not the rest of it??  Isn't is the same when a Muslim guy says. "It is within the Muslim laws that a Muslim guy can have up till 4 wives."  - But they didn't talk about what are the criterias of doing so, the do's and dont's and the fairness of treating all 4 wives.  So, what's the reason again??

If a wive knows her duties and responsibility, she would know damn well that posting such a comment is unnecessary and in all fairness, it degrades herself and her family.  Isn't it better instead of posting that caption, she should have posted on her status about how much she loves her husband and her family and doa' for happiness and health? .......even if her husband is an asshole and a dick.  Who knows it might just soften him up.  Who knows, maybe her husband isn't a dick at all......... it's all just a figment of imagination of herself??  There was a song that goes, "Tuhan tolong lembutkan hati dia....... untuk terima ku seadanya.  Kerna ku tak sanggup, kerna ku tak mampu, hidup tanpa dia disisi ku....".  Unless otherwise.